Column links

Read the above for Friday's lesson.

Really, really short stories... 140 characters

Think 300 is difficult? Have a look at these:

It was only when the water from the taps turned yellow and foamy that we figured out where the missing child was.
— Stephanie Ye, MA student in Creative Writing Prose Fiction at UEA

The farm was too much for John, so he welcomed his brother’s help. One night they drank heavily, leaving a cigarette to ignite the blaze.
— Lynne McKinney, Words and Women member

“It’s done!” the Alchemist said. Creating the Elixir of Immortality had taken decades. He was about to drink it then bam! – heart attack.
— Bernardo Bueno, UEA Creative and Critical Writing PhD Alumnus (2013)

Find more at

140 Launches

What's a sentence?

You only need a verb and subject to create a simple sentence.

Jesus wept.

That's the shortest sentence in the Bible. Subject - Jesus, wept - verb.

It's simple, but think of the feeling behind it. Consider, the son of god - powerful, all-seeing, immortal (kind of), highest status etc - simply crying. A human emotion, first thing we do as babies, which is associated with despair, upset etc. Short sentences can have big meaning, especially when these sentences have been led up to with powerful prose.

Normally, there's an object too.

Jesus chased the car.

The object is 'the car'.

Don't write in fragments (sentences without either Subject or Verb) unless for good reason. Tell the examiner that it's a fragment with an ellipsis or ... (only three dots). Dialogue has it's own rules, which we'll cover later.

Complex Sentences - revise

Complex Sentence Guide

Use a dictionary and thesaurus

Again not optional. To get to the high levels of AO1 you're going to truly understand the words you've used. Thesaurus is great for getting alternatives, but make sure you look up new words in your dictionary.

The best place to find new vocabulary? Reading.

Task 2 - The Spider

Watch this film. What type of narrative is created? What is the setting and question script writer's choice? The characters are very different - Jack and Jill - why is tension created? Who is the protagonist and what resolution does he/she desire? At what point would you stop writing? Is there a resolution? 

Discuss this in class.... 

Outcome: 300 words from Jack and Jill's perspective, plus contrasting piece in informative style. 

Adverbs - a health warning

"Gosh, golly, George!" said Timmy, excitedly. "We've solved the case - the swarvy foreigner did steal Lady Butteaux's diamonds and we're off for a smashing feed at Old Pompous House. What could be more spliffing?"

What's wrong with this, aside from the Famous Five's dog talking.

Spot the adverb. Is it necessary? Surely the text should reveal the character's emotions.

Task 1: Creative Alphabet

You are to write a story in 26 sentences using the letters of alphabet in order.

Write in 1st or 3rd person. Keep in past tense.

Here's an example:

Abracadabrah!.......Abracadab…….wake up, you little bastard. 

Bollocks, did I say that out loud?

Children, shout hello Mr Bunnikins, when you see him come out of the hat.

Doesn’t seem to be waking up, come on now Mr Bunnikins, help me out here, this is our best trick.

Everybody is waiting Mr Bunnikins, come on now little fella.

For God's sake, nothing, he’s not moving.

God, I definitely said that out loud.

Hellooo, Mr Bunnikins, time to wake up now and say hello to all these nice boys and girls.

I am definitely going to have to get another rabbit.

Jump up and down now kids, like lovely fluffy rabbits, careful now, steady on.

Karma, that’s what it is, what goes around comes around and I’ve been one mean bastard to that rabbit.

Look now, settle down. Mr Bunnikins is very sleepy, he’s all curled up, fast asleep, so we better not disturb the little guy.

No, please don’t shake the hat. He won’t like that, you’ll frighten him.

Off my wand, you little sod.

Please don’t cry, I’ve got other tricks, lots of other great tricks.

Quickly now back in your seats

Right let’s see who wants to pick a card, not the whole bloody pack.

Sorry, no that’s fine Xavier. You take the whole pack if you want to, it’s your birthday.

The rabbit is not dead, don’t be silly. He's just fallen over.

Upsadaisy, let’s get him back in the box.

Well would you look at the time, it’s nearly time to go.

Xavier, your mummy will be here any minute.

Yep, that’s it then kids, looks like it’s time for birthday cake.

Zip your lip kid, the rabbit is not dead. Rabbit's sleep with their eyes open. I am surprised you didn’t know that smart arse.

By CB McDermott

Genius Bloggers!

Read, admire and repelicate... if possible.

James Henry

(writer of the Green Wing) 

Thought provoking and well constructed

Eclectic Boogaloo

Stephen Fry

If you want an example of tight, well-constructed pros, look no further than

Fry on Apple

Let's start a discussion on examples of blogs you've found.

Travel Around the World Using Blogs

Worldwide Blogs

I spent a fascinating half hour visiting cities across the globe. I particularly liked Perth (my mum lives there - but never goes to any of the places mentioned), Vancouver (do they have vacancies for teachers?) and Transport Sydney which is a good example of tight, informative writing. 

Enjoy and comment.

Task 3 - Writing on Demand - examiner's report (Edited and annotated)

Examination Reports 2014 and 2015

AO1

Students should be regularly interrogating their work- and referring back to the detail of the question- from the planning to the writing and through to the final checking and editing to ensure that it is fulfilling the requirements. They may want to try to position themselves as the publisher or the reader and ask if what they are producing would be suitable. This may require encouraging students to think about the content and structure of a range of different writing briefs as they progress through the course.

BE SELF CRITICAL – EDIT YOUR OWN WORK – TRY TO VIEW IT AS READER OR THE PUBLISHER

Content and structure are key… HOW COULD YOU ENSURE THESE ARE EXCELLENT

‘development’ of ideas

This involves having an independent and lively voice, which is why ‘confident development’ appears in the Band 4 of the AO1 mark scheme.

Responses should have a clear and engaging opening and a sense that the writer knows where they are going.

Signposting can be achieved by simple links between paragraphs, or it can be more complex and subtle use of repetition or reiteration of a particular idea or theme. DISCUSS

In 300 words it is expected that a tight and clear focus is going to produce better results than trying to tackle a wide range of ideas and issues. THOUGHT: IF YOU WANT TO SOPHISTICATED IN WRITING HOW CAN WE BE SIMPLE WITH JUST ONE IDEA?

SIMPLE WAYS TO SHOW DEVELOPMENT:

1

2

3

It is also important that students are ambitious and imaginative in their responses and in their use of language, in particular.

Confident approaches might include using puns or cultural references in the titles or feeling confident to make jokes or comments that the particular readers would understand. For example, confident responses to Q4 described specific and idiosyncratic aspects of education establishments in an engaging way.

HOW TO GENERATE ‘AMBITIOUS’ USE OF LANGUAGE

1

2

3

Responses that are written in a mundane or inappropriately informal style, for example, even if the brief is requiring a first person voice, are unlikely to be demonstrating ‘crafted’ writing.

At this level it would be expected that students would be very much aware of the crucial nature of thoughtful and controlled punctuation and sentence structures alongside flexible use of paragraphing that will guide the reader.

Students who have been have been explicitly encouraged to vary sentence types and punctuation are more likely to demonstrate these high level skills in their responses.

SUBJECT:

GENRE:

LONG SENTENCE, SHORT SENTENCE, LONG SENTENCE, SHORT SENTENCE

AO2

Examiners reported a particular disappointment that some of the most imaginative and absorbing writers were not writing in grammatically secure structures, or were paragraphing in the most perfunctory and mechanical manner.

Avoid: being tautological*; over-writing; over use of cliché; not recognising cliché; using idioms; misusing words – usually ambitious in language, but not secure. (Top range of pupils)

There was still a lot of cliché (this issue was raised in the Examiner’s Report 2014) such as the ‘roller coaster ride’ of education. Although clichés play an important role in vernacular conversation, for example, they are generally edited out of good quality professional writing.(2015)

Demarcating sentences was also a disappointing weakness 2015 (shape your writing)

WHEN IS IT BEST TO MAKE MISTAKES? WHAT PURPOSE DO MISTAKES SERVE?

AQA recommends following sites like

 http://5by5.tv/wfyl

Why? DISCUSS

It was also felt that some of the less successful responses were very generalised. The most engaging responses offered actual names/pseudonyms, dates, sensory descriptions and gave an impression of noticing detail, such as a relative in Florida emailing home about their diabetes medication, a person looking in the mirror wondering if they will see Philip Larkin’s face looking back at them. This detail makes a piece of writing specific and much more “highly developed”.

It essential that students are very firmly encouraged to be self-reflective and editorial in approach.

Following simple rules such as avoiding passive constructions, using adverbs and adjectives with caution, and maintaining viewpoint in writing can be taught and practised in quite a straightforward way and can provide helpful technical signposts for young writers.

·         Big Dog chased the police car.

·         The police car was chased by Big Dog.

·         We ate every bite of food.

·         Peggy ate the bone.

·         The bone was eaten by Peggy.

·         Every bite of food was eaten by us.

Active or passive?

Edit your work (show the examiner what you’re doing)

There were a surprisingly high number of scripts that were submitted with virtually no evidence of planning or drafting, such as crossing out or alterations. Although it is up to the individual students to decide how to approach the planning and completion of the tasks, examiners raised a concern that quite a number did not appear to be self-editing. It is worth reminding reluctant editors that professional writers would never submit an unaltered first draft for publication.

General advice

Students should be encouraged to clearly label, and preferably cross through, all draft work. Some students provided two or three very full drafts that were not labelled as such and examiners were not sure which to mark. Drafts will only be considered if final pieces are left unfinished, but otherwise will be ignored. Students should also leave some space between each response so there is room for examiners to write their comments and place their marks - students could for example start a response on the next page. All pages are checked so work will not be missed if there is a gap and it would be very helpful as part of a smooth examining process.

Word count was an issue for some students and we would like to emphasise that students should be adhering to the 300 word advice, in order to produce sharply focused writing.

The majority of responses were in the form of prose non-fiction/fiction, but there were some successful poetry and script responses and so students are still encouraged to consider these forms as writing options in the examination. DON’T BE SCARED. 

Use a style guide! Not optional

Unsure of the difference between abjure and adjure? Want guide on what to call someone who offers advice? Unsure of the difference between advice and advise?

Use a style guide.

We will be using this:

http://www.theguardian.com/guardian-observer-style-guide-a

So what does 300 words look like?

Lorem ipsum dolor seit amet, consectetuer adipiscing elit. Aenean commodo ligula eget dolor. Aenean massa. Cum sociis natoque penatibus et magnis dis parturient montes, nascetur ridiculus mus. Donec quam felis, ultricies nec, pellentesque eu, pretium quis, sem. Nulla consequat massa quis enim. Donec pede justo, fringilla vel, aliquet nec, vulputate eget, arcu. In enim justo, rhoncus ut, imperdiet a, venenatis vitae, justo. Nullam dictum felis eu pede mollis pretium. Integer tincidunt. Cras dapibus. Vivamus elementum semper nisi. Aenean vulputate eleifend tellus. Aenean leo ligula, porttitor eu, consequat vitae, eleifend ac, enim. Aliquam lorem ante, dapibus in, viverra quis, feugiat a, tellus. Phasellus viverra nulla ut metus varius laoreet. Quisque rutrum. Aenean imperdiet. Etiam ultricies nisi vel augue. Curabitur ullamcorper ultricies nisi. Nam eget dui. Etiam rhoncus. Maecenas tempus, tellus eget condimentum rhoncus, sem quam semper libero, sit amet adipiscing sem neque sed ipsum. Nam quam nunc, blandit vel, luctus pulvinar, hendrerit id, lorem. Maecenas nec odio et ante tincidunt tempus. Donec vitae sapien ut libero venenatis faucibus. Nullam quis ante. Etiam sit amet orci eget eros faucibus tincidunt. Duis leo. Sed fringilla mauris sit amet nibh. Donec sodales sagittis magna. Sed consequat, leo eget bibendum sodales, augue velit cursus nunc, quis gravida magna mi a libero. Fusce vulputate eleifend sapien. Vestibulum purus quam, scelerisque ut, mollis sed, nonummy id, metus. Nullam accumsan lorem in dui. Cras ultricies mi eu turpis hendrerit fringilla. Vestibulum ante ipsum primis in faucibus orci luctus et ultrices posuere cubilia Curae; In ac dui quis mi consectetuer lacinia. Nam pretium turpis et arcu. Duis arcu tortor, suscipit eget, imperdiet nec, imperdiet iaculis, ipsum. Sed aliquam ultrices mauris. Integer ante arcu, accumsan a, consectetuer eget, posuere ut, mauris. Praesent adipiscing. Phasellus ullamcorper ipsum rutrum nunc. Nunc nonummy metus. Vestibulum volutpat pretium libero. Cras id dui. Aenean ut

Just like this. Not much at all. This is your word limit for Writing on demand. What is wrong with the way I've laid out this Latin text? 

Be Excited about Grammar

You are going to be judged on your writing so it makes sense to perfect the technical aspect of your creativity. Lets face it, youre not going to taken seriously if you dont know how to use apostrophes (or appreciate subtle use of irony). 

I recommend Lynne Truss as a introduction to the life of a pedant. Dont worry, sorry, don't worry, people will accept you correcting their use of less and fewer after a while. Keep the faith... 

Lynne Truss quotes

PS If you can count it, use 'fewer' (like chickens or nuclear warheads) while if in it's quantity (like milk or sick) use 'less'. Juxtaposition is placing things together for effect - like 'milk and sick'.  

Get inspired! Read on.

The UEA was the first British University to offer Creative Writing - look at the list of alumni - and the breadth of writing is quite staggering. Everyone needs to read through these.
New Writing at UEA

"What should I do with this?" you ask, considering skimming through the poetry for five minutes before returning to Cwazy Cupcakes. No!

Read through the poems as you've already written one. Print off, say three. Annotate them, try to understand what the poet is saying. Print off your poem, annotate it. Try to work out what you are saying. Place them in a ring-binder in a section marked poetry.

Extension: write another poem, perhaps inspired by what you've read. If you've written an introverted verse dripping with angst (that's cool) read Sylvia Plath's Daddy
http://www.poetryfoundation.org/poem/178960

Look at this very cool Slam Poetry inspired by Daddy
Daddy - Slam Poetry